


I'm Gonna Kill Myself

by SailorLestrade



Category: Olympics RPF, Swimming RPF
Genre: Dancing with the stars - Freeform, Depression, Love, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Phlochte - Freeform, Skype, Suicide Attempt, sad but happy at the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-14
Updated: 2016-09-14
Packaged: 2018-08-14 23:27:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8033170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SailorLestrade/pseuds/SailorLestrade
Summary: Ryan 12:41 am: I’m gonna kill myself.Michael rubbed his eyes before reading the screen again. He had been staring at the TV for too long. Maybe he just got it wrong. Because this was Ryan…





	I'm Gonna Kill Myself

Ryan 12:41 am: I’m gonna kill myself.

Michael rubbed his eyes before reading the screen again. He had been staring at the TV for too long. Maybe he just got it wrong. Because this was Ryan…

Michael 12:42 am: What are you talking about? I’m going to Skype you, okay?

Michael was worried. What if he didn’t pick up? What if he did something in the time it took him to type out that stupid message….

But then Ryan answered. He looked like a mess. He looked like he hadn’t slept or bathed since the Dancing with the Stars episode. That wasn’t the Ryan Michael knew and loved. He was so mad that he couldn’t be there for him. And so sad to see him in this state.

“Ry…”

“Hey Mike…” Ryan said softly, his voice barely above a whisper. It sounded like it was full of sadness and pain.

“Ry…what was with that text?” Michael asked softly, scared to know the real answer but he knew it had to happen.

“Exactly what it said.” Ryan responded. Michael felt the tears filling his eyes then.

“Doggy, please no. You can’t leave me.” Michael whimpered, not wanting to believe this was true. He could hear music playing in the background and it wasn’t Ryan’s typical genre.

“I’ll just screw this up too. Obviously I can’t ever fix what I did.” Ryan looked down. Michael wanted to hunt down those guys who did this. He knew that Ryan was wrong with Rio, but he was trying so hard to fix it. And all the progress they had made was gone. Ryan was back in his despair.

“You didn’t screw anything up.” Michael said. “You just have to hold on.”

“That’s easy for you to say.” Ryan said. “You got three months. You still were the greatest in everybody’s eyes. But me…”

“You’re still the greatest in my eyes.” Michael said softly. “I’m going to fly out there tomorrow morning and we’re going to talk properly. You just can’t do anything until then.” Ryan sighed. “Please?”

“Okay.” Ryan finally said. Michael smiled some then got an idea.

“You have six gold medals and I have twenty-three. I want you to promise me that you won’t kill yourself for a year for each gold medal.” Michael said. Ryan looked up into the camera.

“That’s, like, twenty-nine years though.” Ryan said. “Why that long?”

“Well, for one, we’ll be married by then, and you’re definatly not leaving my ass.” Michael chuckled when he saw the small smile on his boyfriend’s face. “And for two, I love you.”

“I love you too Michael.” Ryan said. “Thanks for talking to me.”

“You don’t have to threaten suicide for me to talk to you.” Michael said, his heart slowly settling. “But I’m glad you reached out to me. I’d hate to get a text from Cheryl.” Ryan nodded and rubbed his eyes. “You should get some sleep doggy. You need it.”

“Okay.” Ryan yawned. “See you in the morning?”

“Will do. I love you doggy.”

“Love you too goldfish.”

With that, the conversation ended and Michael immediately went about trying to find a flight. He had to be there for Ryan. If he ever lost him…he didn’t want to think about that right then. All he wanted to do was be with him. He wanted to protect him.

Because as much as people hated to admit it, there was no Michael Phelps if not for Ryan Lochte.

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment


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